Gundam Pilots At Hogwarts
by O.o yaoi fangirl O.o
Summary: UP FOR ADOPTION! 15 years after Voldemort's first defeat, the Wizarding World needs their hero. Everyone, meet Harry Potter—er…I mean Chang Wufei. 1x2x5 3x4
1. Crazy Old Man Say What?

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Gundam Wing. If I did, you can be assured there would've slash going on. BTW. I know this isn't a new chapter, but Spark, who unfortunately does not seem to have a account, pointed out that the G Boys weren't paranoid enough.. So I decided to fix it. Tell me if it's better or not.

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Wufei smiled grimly. Panting, he leaned on his katana, trying to catch his breath. He raised his arm, hardly sparing a glance at the bodies surrounding him, and said, "Mission completed. Target destroyed." He picked up his katana and started the long trek home.

~.~

"I'm back," Wufei called. Frowning when there was answer, Wufei walked into the sitting room. He saw Heero, Duo, Quatre, and Trowa sitting stiffly around the room, guns raised toward a small group of strangers. Wufei tensed, hand going automatically to his already bloody katana. "04," Wufei said neutrally, "What is going on?"

"05," Trowa replied flatly, "Just a minor issue. It should be resolved soon. Don't worry about it."

"Are you hurt?" Quartre cut in anxiously.

Wufei ignored Quatre. It wasn't like he was bleeding or anything. He focused half of his attention on Trowa, the other half on the strangely attired group. He snapped out irritably, "03, you have a gun pointed at those people. Now tell me. What. Is. Going. On?"

The pilots exchanged a glance, making sure that one eye was always focused on the strangers. Wufei's eye twitched angrily, as his question was ignored. Wufei opened his mouth, about to start ranting, when Heero spoke up.

"Do you know these people?" Heero cut in harshly, effectively ending Wufei's stillborn tirade, and gesturing at the three strangers standing paralyzed in front of the fireplace.

Wufei scanned the faces. "No." He replied shortly. "Why?"

"They seem to think your name is Harry Potter and want you to leave to go to a made up magic school!" Duo exclaimed, unable to hold it in any longer. He didn't want Wufei to be this Harry Potter. Wufei was HIS. Well, his and Heero's at any rate. Wufei just didn't know it yet.

Wufei twitched irritably, and glowered at the strangers. What was with all these people and claiming that he was Harry Potter? He was Chang Wufei, and he was going to stay Chang Wufei!

"Oh?" Wufei elegantly raised an eyebrow. "Well, I can assure you, my name is not Harry Potter. I am Chang Wufei and has been for fifteen years. Now, if there's nothing else, I'm going to take a shower." Picking up his katana, he crossed the room to the stairs. Stopping before putting his foot on the first step, he turned. "Feel free to interrogate them 02," Wufei stated simply before going up the stairs.

Duo grinned evilly. This was going to be _fun_. The three strangers gulped at the look in his eyes. Quatre cut in before Duo could bring out the torture tools. Duo slumped in disappointment. Trowa patted Duo's arm, a small glimmer of amusement shining slyly in his one visible eye. "Who is this Harry you were talking about?" Quatre asked with an innocent tilt of his head.

"Let me introduce me and my companions first," the old man suggested, blue eyes twinkling. "My name is Albus Dumbledore, and this is Minerva McGonagall and Severus Snape." He beamed at them.

The four Gundam pilots looked at him impatiently, guns still aimed steadily at the group. "Well old guy, what's the story?" Duo asked with an impatient jerk of his head.

( Dumbledore tells of Voldemort's defeat by a baby….15 minutes later)

"I do not understand what this has to do with Wufei," Trowa said with a puzzled tone.

"I think…" Quatre said, biting his lip. "I think that they think that Wufei is their Harry Potter."

"WHAT?"

Already out of the shower and dressed, Wufei grabbed the gun sitting on his nightstand, and ran down the stairs aiming it at the three strangers that caused his comrades…no, his friends to yelp so loudly. He genuinely had no idea what was going on, but he was pretty sure it had something to do with his past. "What happened?"

"Nothing 05. Everything is fine," Quatre soothed, desperate to keep things peaceful. Wufei ignored him.

"03. What happened?" Wufei demanded.

"05. These three think they are wizards. They think that you are someone named Harry Potter. This Harry Potter defeated some Dark Lord when he was one and then disappeared off the face of the Earth after being placed on the doorstep of his aunt's home," Trowa reported quickly, with disbelief coloring his voice's undertone.

Wufei raised an eyebrow at the old man. "Prove it," he challenged. Dumbledore pulled out his wand and levitated a book sitting on the table. Shocked, Wufei dropped onto the couch, sitting between Duo and Heero, both who were cheering inwardly. "How did you do that?" he breathed, eyes wide with wonder.

"Magic," Snape sneered. "Not that I'd expect your pitiful mind to understand that."

"But the Physics!" Quatre spluttered. "The Law of Gravity! It doesn't make sense."

"What are Physics?" Dumbledore asked curiously.

Seeing Wufei about to launch into a long explanation on Physics, Trowa hastily said, "Never mind. It's not important."

"Look man—Dumbledore," Duo said earnestly to Dumbledore, bringing the topic back on track. "I don't know what you've been snorting—" Duo ignored McGonagall who had choked at that, "But Wufei isn't your Harry Potter. For one thing, he's Asian—Chinese to be specific. He has shown no magical abilities, his birthday is nowhere near July 31st, and he grew up on L5. Plus he hasn't done magic at all in all the years that we have known him."

"Chang said earlier that he had been Chang Wufei for the past fifteen years. He's sixteen now, is he not?" Snape inquired, rather abruptly.

"Yes…" Heero said frowning, not sure where the hook nosed man was going with this.

"Well then who was he in the first year of his life?" Snape asked triumphantly.

"That's a good question actually," Trowa said, and turned to Wufei, who had frozen in place. "Wufei?"

"That is none of your business," Wufei bit out tightly, glaring at everybody.

"Awww Wu-baby, don't be like that!" Duo cooed, ignoring Wufei's irritated snap of 'Maxwell!' "We want to know, don't we Hee-chan?"

"Hn," was all the response Duo got.

"Please Wufei?" Quatre asked with big blue eyes. Snape looked disgusted at the display. McGonagall was trying not to (and failing at) coo at Quatre. Dumbledore just twinkled at everyone in the room. Then all stares and silent begs turned on him. After five minutes of glaring, Wufei cracked.

"Fine. If it makes you shut up, I'll tell you," Wufei said, glowering at his friends. They all nodded frantically.

("But they weren't even speaking!" Snape complained. He was duly ignored.)

"I guess I should tell you how I got on L5 in the first place…" Wufei trailed off, gathering his thoughts.

"I was abandoned on L5 when I was two," Wufei began, his onyx eyes distant. "I don't know where I was or who I was before, but my earliest memory is lying in an empty side alley, completely helpless." Wufei's hands tightened, and his friends nodded understandingly. They knew how much Wufei hated being or feeling helpless. It was something they all found in common. "My parent, they found me, and decided to adopt me, having no heir to their line. They performed a common adoption ritual in the clan, and so I gradually began to take the features of the clan. I had fully taken on the features of my adoptive family by the time I was five. My life continued on normally, and you know what happened later. I entered an arranged marriage and L5 was destroyed soon after, so I vowed vengeance. Everything after that is common knowledge."

Snape looked puzzled. "What did you say your last name was again?" he inquired.

"His name's Chang Wufei," Quatre offered helpfully, when he saw that Wufei was still caught up in his memories.

Snape looked thoughtful. Well, as thoughtful as the sneering man could look anyway. "Isn't Chang a Wizarding name?" he said pointedly at McGonagall.

McGonagall gave a gasp. She could see where he was going with this. If Harry Potter was blood-adopted by a Wizarding family, it would explain why his looks were different. "Blood-adoption!" she exclaimed excitedly. "Albus, isn't there a potion that could show the adoptee's true lineage?"

"Yes, you're right…I think I have some on me," Dumbledore responded, eyes twinkling again. "Now where did I put it?" He began muttering to himself, while patting his robe pockets in search of said potion. "Ah ha! No, wait, that's not it." The Gundam Pilots watched in fascination, their eyebrows getting higher and higher, as Dumbledore just took bigger and bigger things out of his seemingly unending pocket. A broom, a book, lemon drops, a backpack, trunk, a gummy version of the Death Mark…Snape and McGonagall just sweat dropped. "Found it!" he said, holding up the vial triumphantly, and handed it over to Snape.

"Mr. Chang, I'll need some of your blood," Snape ordered, removing a switchblade from his pocket and uncapping the vial.

"Why?" Wufei asked suspiciously.

"Because this potion is like a muggle DNA test," Snape replied snappishly. "Now, blood."

Wufei was hesitant. Blood, especially when given freely, was dangerous. But, he rationalized, as long he was careful to only get it in the vial, it should be okay. Wufei glanced at his fellow pilots, and when he saw their shrugs, nodded curtly at the Potions professor. He nicked his finger with a dagger and squeezed a drop of blood into the potion. The potion smoked, and out of the smoke formed elegant script:

Harry James Potter (Chang Wufei)  
Father: Chang LiHun (Adopted)  
Mother: Chang MeiYuan (Adopted)

Father: James Harold Potter  
Mother: Lily Ana Potter (nee Evans)

The pilots' jaws dropped.

AN: AHAHA...haha...ha...

I actually had finished editing this like months ago, but I kept on forgeting to upload it...WHOOPS. Sorryyy. And yes, I am writing Chapter 4. But the first couple times I tried writing it, it comes out like crack. Actually, it's still coming out like crack So bear with me. Just don't hate me my loyal and devoted readers. Hah. Who am I kidding? I'm pretty sure you guys hated me ages ago. And I have finals next week, and then I'm off to Europe for a couple weeks with no computer...So. My apologies. You can feel free to hit me know. But you know. REVIEW FIRST.


	2. Warning: Crack!

Haha, so I feel a bit guilty on not having updated. This is a crack chapter, because this is what came out when I was attempting to write the next chapter. The actual chapter's a…little very short. Like 2 paragraphs long. So…here's a crack chappie for you kiddies!

I don't own Harry Potter or the Gundam Pilots.

"Huh. Well whaddaya know? They're right. You really are this Harry Potter guy," Duo stated obviously.

"Hn," Heero and Wufei chorused together, their monosyllabic answer really meaning 'No duh dumbass.'

Trowa grunted, his non-word implying, _Why are we even listening to them? It's obvious their faking everything. _He conveniently ignored that there was no way the group could have set up the flying book.

"Yeah, Tro-tro's right. Are you guys leaving now or do we have to kick you out?" Duo agreed.

"Guys!" Quatre admonished. "There is no need to be rude. We all know they're psychedelic hippies, but there's no need to crush their sad, sad delusions."

Wufei raised an eyebrow, which conveyed _Hypocritical much?_ quite well.

Quatre flushed, and turned to the trio of hippies. "Sorry, you can leave now."

"NO!" Dumbledore shouted dramatically, planting a foot on the glass coffee table and raising a fist in the air. "WE SHALL NOT LEAVE WITHOUT HARRY POTTER!"

The Gundam pilots stared. Finally, Trowa responded.

"He's not here." The _You can leave now_ floated between the two groups, unspoken.

Dumbledore stood his ground. The pilots whipped out guns from nowhere.

Snape and McGonagall looked at the guns, stood up, and apparated out. Dumbledore ignored their abandonment, and cried, "Your silly muggle toys can't hurt me, and I have magic. Behold the sparklies flying from my wand! Petrif—!" Dumbledore was cut off.

Heero had shot him in the chest. Five times.

Wufei raised an eyebrow again.

Heero merely replied with a "Hn." What he meant was _They were going to take you away! *Pout*_ Of course, this subtext conveniently went over Wufei's head, while the other pilots watched the byplay in fascination.

Duo cut in. "Hee-chan's right! Besides, we all knew they were going to blow us up."

Finally, Quatre noticed the mess of blood and the dead body. "Heero, I hope you know you're cleaning that up."

Heero looked at Quatre, and then at the mess. He walked away, and out the front door, dragging Wufei and Duo with him.

Quatre heard the car engine start, and move away from the mansion, Wufei's cries of "INJUSTICE!" fading away every second. Quatre looked up at Trowa with puppy dog eyes. Trowa groaned and went to get the cleaning supplies…and a body bag.


	3. Half a Chapter and a Author's Note

Collecting himself, and admittedly unable to further deny his parentage and the existence of magic, Wufei realized that no one ever told him why there were people insisting he was Harry Potter.

Shaking his head at his own absentmindedness, Wufei questioned, "So why are you here looking for me?"

Dumbledore beamed and said nothing.

Wufei just looked at him.

Dumbledore beamed some more.

Wufei raised an eyebrow.

Dumbled—

"OH FOR MERLIN'S SAKE!" Snape burst out uncharacteristically. "Potter," ("Actually his last name's Chang," interjected Duo helpfully. Snape told him to shut up.) "We are in the middle of a war, and there is a prophecy saying that you are destined to defeat the Dark Lord."

"What Dark Lord?" Wufei said finally after a short period of silence, utterly convinced that these people were utterly bonkers if they thought he was going to get involved in yet another war. "And what prophecy?"

Dumbledore opened his mouth to talk, when Snape cut in. "Albus, shut up. We all know that you're not going to give a straight answer."

Dumbledore sulked, "But Severus!"

McGonagall sighed, wondering why she had to put up with these people on a daily basis. "Boys," she said warningly. Dumbledore looked suitably chastened, while Snape still seemed angry.

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OKAY HI GUYS. I'M REALLY SORRY THAT I HAVEN'T POSTED IN SUCH A LONG TIME, BUT I REALLY LOST A LOT OF MOMENTUM ON THIS FIC. My writing style, when I was looking back at this in the last couple of weeks, is shit. Complete shit. And I've been on a poetry kick. So I'm going to take the time to work on my writing skills. I appreciate all the reviews, follows, and favorites I've gotten but I AM NOT GOING TO BE CONTINUING THIS FIC. THIS IS OFFICALLY AND PERMANENTLY UP FOR ADOPTION.

I no longer remember the characteristics of the Gundam Pilots, and I don't have the time to check. Fic writing is now basically a once in a while hobby that I'll remember to do now and then. Again. THIS IS UP FOR ADOPTION. FOREVER.

P.S. I am no longer going to be on this site.


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